So this Easter Bunny thing got me all confused. It looks like Easter Sunday is similar to Christmas Day, but with a colored-egg-laying bunny instead of a plump dude dressed in red, and I had no idea. I’m positive I’ve messed this holiday up. Mike calls the other day to remind me about having the kids’ Easter presents ready for Sunday. Huh? What presents? We are going to Grandma’s, does that count? Apparently not.
I have to be honest. I’m a little bit bothered by this Easter Bunny business. It seems like every month there is something going on that calls for a shopping trip somewhere. I thought for a second about rebelling and buying nothing. But I know the kids will be expecting something and who wants to see the disappointment in their faces, right? Then I think about how it’s time to update their wardrobe, and how maybe I could kill two birds with one stone: I’ll get them some clothes as their Easter present! How clever! So I get out and buy them dresses, t-shirts, shoes, and a couple of swimsuits. I get home super excited and… 1) Andoni couldn’t care less. It’s not an iTunes card, so zero interest; 2) Maitane is super happy. Yey! But when she tries the shoes and they don’t totally fit, she immediately throws a tantrum. You should have seen her, wow… She even beats me in the drama queen department. Impressive.
Besides, who the heck is this Bunny anyway? How did he get all mixed up with Easter? And why does he bring chocolate eggs of various colors? Luckily, we have Google now. Best invention since coffee. Did you know the Easter Bunny goes as far back as the 16 century? It appears to have originated in Alsace and the Upper Rhineland (France and Germany, respectively). The egg-laying bunny idea did not arrive into the US until the 18th century, though. And, do you know why he brings eggs? Eggs were forbidden to Catholics during the fast of Lent, so there were a ton of them left by the time Easter came around. Interesting.
Also, another interesting, shocking and truly quite disturbing fact about bunnies and hares is that the females can conceive a second litter of offspring while still pregnant with the first. That’s horrible, ok? I wish I’d had this piece of information during the last couple of months of my first pregnancy, when I kept thinking my belly couldn’t possibly get bigger. (No, seriously, it can’t get bigger now. Now for sure it can’t. Ok, now it can’t really be possible.) I’d have felt way better knowing that someone had it rougher than me, even if it were just a rabbit. What can I say? Misery loves company.
Anyway, back to my story. So we go to a birthday party, have coffee at Diana’s house, and make it back home. We have dinner, watch “Bend It Like Beckham” and, what do you know? Maitane wants to know when the Easter Bunny is coming! And I’m like, wait… He already came! Didn’t I show you all your dresses? But, she pouts, won’t he even bring us candy? O-M-G. I got no candy at home, and I’m not going to the store at midnight to buy some. I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t tell them about the swimsuits.
Swimsuits are better than candy, right?
I’m sick of spending money I don’t have in crap I don’t need. I say screw all the holidays from now on!
Except Mother’s Day, of course.
I’m willing to give up Mother’s Day, mirá lo que te digo…