I’m pretty sure I know exactly how a (straight) man feels in the middle of Sephora. Probably the same way I feel when I have to go inside the Home Depot, once or twice a year. A couple of times might not seem like a lot, but when you loathe something like I hate going to a home improvement store, that’s two times too many. Just driving through their parking lot gives me the heebie jeebies, an intense and unavoidable sense of boredom sinks in as I get closer to the automatic sliding doors. No matter the island, there is not a goddamn thing in there I want to buy. Except for hammers and paint, I have no clue what the other two thousand five hundred sixty two items can do. Neither do I care. I just cross my fingers and pray that their associate knows I mean caulk when I say “white sticky thingy for around the sink”. I would happily cook for your family of six in exchange for a trip to ACE Hardware. I’d give up my Mac and use your PC for a month. A flip phone for a week instead of the iPhone if it saves me a visit to Grover’s. I’d even go to church on Sundays with Ysabel and Esther, but please, please, for the love of God, you go to D & B Supply!
- The end of the Scouts
- Did you have something you wanted to run by Boise’s Mayor Bieter? Now it’s your chance